sapiosexual

Sapio**7**ual: Wha I Mea s

I his A icle

Sapio**7**uali y mea s ha a pe so is **7**ually a ac ed o highly i ellige people, so much so ha hey co side i o be he mos impo a ai i a pa e . I is a ela ively ew wo d ha has become mo e popula i ece yea s.

Bo h LGBTQ people a d he e o**7**ual people may ide ify as sapio**7**ual.

Howeve , some people who ide ify as sapio**7**ual do so i o de o claim a **7**ual ide i y ha ’s ou side of adi io al bi a ies such as he e o**7**ualhomo**7**ual a d malefemale. This app oach seems o be mo e commo amo g you ge people i e ac i g i digi al spaces.

The e is deba e ove he p ecise a u e of sapio**7**uali y. Some claim i as a **7**ual o ie a io o **7**uali y, a d ce ai da i g apps eve allow use s o ide ify as sapio**7**ual. O he people say i ’s a i app op ia e bid fo quee ess f om a commu i y ha is o ma gi alized he way o he **7**ual o ie a io s a e.

O he s see sapio**7**uali y as a fe ish, specifically fo i ellige ce. S ill o he s hi k i s addles he wo ca ego ies: o ie a io a d fe ish.

The ul ima e mea i g of “sapio**7**uali y” depe ds o he i e io of he pe so usi g he wo d. I ca sugges a y hi g f om a ge e al p efe e ce fo sma pa e s o a ype of pa **7**uali y i which i ellige ce umps eve y hi g a d makes ge de i eleva .

How Sapio**7**uali y Wo ks i Rela io ships

People who co side hemselves sapio**7**ual of e fi d hemselves i ela io ships wi h people who have a simila fe isho ie a io . These couples of e e joy i ellec ual ac ivi y as a i eg al pa of emo io al bo di g a d eve physical fo eplay.

If a sapio**7**ual pe so is i a ela io ship wi h a pa e who does ’ sha e hese i e es s, i ’s impo a fo bo h people o wo k oge he o make su e ha eve yo e’s eeds a e me .

FAQs

Wha ’s he diffe e ce be wee sapio**7**uali y a d simply p efe i g o da e sma people?

While ma y people wa ma es who a e sma , sapio**7**uali y focuses o i ellige ce o a much s o ge deg ee.

Do ’ mos people fi d i ellige ce a ac ive?

Yes, o a poi .

A eam of Aus alia esea che s developed he Sapio**7**ual Ques io ai e (SapioQ) i o de o es whe he people we e **7**ually a ac ed o i ellige ce (which hey defi ed wi h a IQ sco e) a d whe he hey wa ed a i ellige pe so as a pa e . They fou d ha he pa icipa s seemed o be **7**ually a d oma ically a ac ed o people wi h above-ave age i ellige ce, up o a IQ of abou 120.

Above a IQ of 120, bo h **7**ual a d pa e i e es dec eased. Ve y high IQs we e o pe ceived as pa icula ly **7**ually a ac ive o as he mos desi able quali y i a pa e .

Why has sapio**7**uali y bee c i icized as ableis o eli is ?

Some people believe ha sapio**7**uali y devalues people wi h diffe e me al abili ies. Those who label i as eli is o Eu oce ic claim ha i ove -values Wes e educa io a d IQ while ig o i g o he fo ms of i ellige ce.

Defe de s of sapio**7**uali y claim ha i ’s based o ela io ship compa ibili y a he ha a judgme of absolu e wo h.

Show Sou ces

SOURCES:

Co i uum: “Compe i g co es a io s of he o m: eme gi g **7**uali ies a d digi al ide i ies.”

Cosmopoli a : “Wha does i mea o be sapio**7**ual?”

I ellige ce: “Some people a e a ac ed **7**ually o i ellige ce: A psychome ic evalua io of sapio**7**uali y.”

Jou al of Homo**7**uali y: “Wha ’s i a Name?”

Medium: “Sapio**7**ualism Is He e o S ay.”

Me iam-Webs e : “Wha Does ‘Sapio**7**ual’ Mea ?”

Pe so ali y a d I dividual Diffe e ces: “Ma e p efe e ces fo educa ed pa e s: Simila i ies a d diffe e ces i he **7**es depe d o ma i g co ex .”

Seve ee : “Am I Sapio**7**ual?”

۱۶ Ways To Tu O A Sapio**7**ual, aka The B ai y Pe so You’ e Supe I o

A sapio**7**ual is someo e who fi ds i ellige ce **7**ually a ac ive o a ousi g. Like all ypes of **7**uali ies, people’s pe so al defi i io s of sapio**7**uali y may va y, bu wha ‘s ce ai is people wi h his ide i y would a he be u ed o by wha hey hi k is you mos allu i g fea u e: you mi d. 

If you’ e da i g a sapio**7**ual pe so a d wa o lea how o u hem o , he fi s s ep is o k ow ypical seduc io a emp s do ‘ wo k fo hem. Thei idea of fo eplay, fo example, is o hea abou you book collec io . Tha mea s you have o cha m hem wi h a sha pe ed i ellec as well as you wi y ba e , compa a ive hi ki g, a d cu iosi y.

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Adve iseme

He e a e 16 ways o c ea e he i ellec ual sy e gy eeded o fi e up a ela io ship wi h a sapio**7**ual: 

Pay a e io o hei u ique i e es s.

sleep suppo

(۲۹۶)

Fi s a d fo emos , k ow ha o wo sapio**7**uals a e alike, says **7**-posi ive cou selo Ashley D. Swee , M.A., LPC, LMHC, CCRC: Bei g a ac ed o i ellige ce o i ellec does o mea he sapio**7**ual i you life will be u ed o by eve y hi g ha falls i he b oad ealm of ‘ e dy.’ 

A easy way o seduce you sapio**7**ual is o ge o k ow hem fo who hey a e. To do ha , Swee e cou ages you o pe use hei bookshelf, social media feeds, o eve hei Ne flix queue o lea he ki ds of co e ha s imula e hem. You fi s i s i c may be o d op a ho game of Ca a o he fi s da e whe , i fac , hey’d be way mo e i o chilli g wi h a episode of Ca l Saga ‘s Cosmos, Swee ells mbg. 

Whe you ca show ge ui e e husiasm o cu iosi y i hei u ique i e es s, sapio**7**ual people will be mo e i cli ed o le you i . 

O a e you fo eplay.

To achieve he ype of i imacy you sapio**7**ual c aves, ake he o us off of physical ouch a d i s ead explo e hei **7**uali y ve bally. 

The b ai is he mos powe ful **7** o ga , explai s ce ified **7** a d ela io ship expe Emily Mo se, Ph.D., a d fo sapio**7**uals, his mi d-body co ec io is c ucial whe i comes o a ousal. Tha ‘s why deeply discussi g bo h you **7**ual desi es a d whe e hey come f om wo ks well fo sapio**7**uals because he bigges u o ca be alki g abou you u -o s.

Be vivid as you desc ibe how you’d like o play ou some fa asies, as well as ge e ous i you exp essio s of how hey make you feel—you migh be su p ised o see you pa e espo d o his much mo e ha a lap da ce. (He e’s ou full guide o di y alk fo a li le i spo.)

As you discove each o he ‘s **7**ual appe i es, Mo se ecomme ds a Yes, No, Maybe? lis o help you lea mo e abou p efe e ces. Fo ma y sapio**7**uals, i ‘ll p ovide e ough ve bal fodde a d fo eplay fo days, she ema ks. O ce couples figu e ou whe e hey’ e alig ed, hey ca spe d ime deep-divi g i o why hey’ e i o wha hey a e a d developi g ex e sive e o ic oad maps.

Adve iseme

Pla book club a d lib a y da es.

The e’s a big cha ce you sapio**7**ual loves lib a ies a d ge i g los i he la ge, expa sive aisles of e dless k owledge. Pa icipa e i hei i e es , bu spice i up a d u i i o a lib a y make-ou ou . Visi diffe e lib a ies i you ow —o ake a day ip o o e i a o he ci y—a d spe d he af e oo pe usi g a d a alyzi g he i les you like. A d, of cou se, s eak some kisses be wee he bookshelves. 

A o he op io is o s a a book club. You ca make a e o ica-books-o ly ule o se a i ima e o e, bu he ac ivi y ca feel jus as **7**y if you wax poe ic abou scie ce o his o y books. The oppo u i y o wa ch you expa d o you views a d sou dly a gue diffe i g opi io s will be hei favo i e pa of he eve i g. 

Discove cul u e oge he .

Sapio**7**ual people a e eage o lea ew hi gs. Whe you pla he ex da e igh , ce ified **7** he apis Michelle He zog, LMFT, CST, sugges s you feed hei cu iosi y a d ake hem o a a galle y, museum, o a y ki d of cul u al ce e ha p ovokes e ligh e i g discou se. B i gi g a sapio**7**ual o a space ha p ovides he oppo u i y o lea ca be i c edibly a ac ive o hem, she says. 

I addi io o ha , explo i g hese spaces oge he gives you a cha ce o u de s a d each o he ‘s i e es s. Sapio**7**uals wa o co ec wi h hei love s by excha gi g k owledge a d philosophical beliefs, so hey’ll elish he cha ce o swap opi io s abou a y hi g ew you lea oge he .

Adve iseme

Le hem each you.

Yes, sapio**7**uals a e a ac ed o i ellige ce, bu hey do ‘ expec you o k ow eve y hi g. No o e ca live up o ha s a da d ( o eve hem), so do ‘ feel p essu ed o awe his pe so wi h you abili y o keep up wi h eve y opic. I s ead, ell hem whe you’ e clueless. 

Af e all, ue i ellec uals ca admi whe hey do ‘ k ow some hi g, a d you pa e migh be imp essed wi h you humili y. Acco di g o Swee , hey ce ai ly wo ‘ be u ed o by you a emp o k ow i all: Pe fo ma ive i ellige ce will fall fla a d likely u you beloved sapio**7**ual igh off. 

O you ex da e, be ho es whe you do ‘ k ow some hi g. You eage ess o lea mo e will be su e o u o a sapio**7**ual, as well as he abili y o flex hei b ai muscles o a opic hey love. 

Have a game igh (bu wi h a wis ).

Play S ip Sc abble, a d you’ll fi d you’ve eve wo ked ha de o bee mo e u ed o by a iple-wo d sco e, Mo se a es s. I his s eamy ve sio of he game, whoeve has fewe poi s by he e d will be aked fi s , bu Mo se o es ha eve yo e wi s i his ve sio of he game. 

You ca y his wi h a game of you sapio**7**ual’s favo i e ivia ca ego ies, oo: Choose a ce ai umbe of clo hi g i ems fo each playe o wea , a d he play as you ypically would. Whe someo e ea s a poi , hey ge o pick o e piece of clo hi g fo he o he playe o emove. Keep playi g u il he game is ove , o whe eve yo e’s as aked as hey’ e comfo able bei g. 

A adul spi wo ks fo mos i ellec ual boa d a d ca d games, so y his wi h o e of you choosi g. Howeve , you ca also skip hem e i ely: S oke you sapio**7**ual’s b ai wi h a fie y game of deba e. No o ly will hey be **7**ually a ac ed o you abili y o eloque ly exp ess you pe spec ive abou a complex subjec , bu hey wo ‘ be able o esis he sigh of you espec fully a gui g you poi s. (Feel f ee o spice his game up wi h a s ip- wis , oo.) 

Adve iseme

Alig you i e es s.

Swee ecomme ds you fi d i e es s ha i e sec , he ge c ea ive o c ea e a i ima e eve i g ha fi es up you mi ds a d bodies. 

A e you bo h fa s of Ala Wa s, fo i s a ce? Pla a Wa s- hemed da e igh . W i e dow some of you favo i e quo es, a d fold hem i o o igami fo you sapio**7**ual love o ope , she sugges s, me io i g a emi de o omi a y ypos o i co ec g amma . If i ‘s some hi g hey’ e comfo able wi h, you ca ole-play, oo: Swee says o ole-play as if you’ e Wa s leadi g a class. As you ead his lec u es aloud, p e e d you love is a **7**y, b illia s ude i he back of he class. 

Use you imagi a io , ge c ea ive, a d go deepe , u ges Swee . Sapio**7**uals love ha !

Adve iseme

A e you up? i s ead of U up?

Exp essio s of i ellige ce a e su e o gai he a ac io of a sapio**7**ual. O e way o show off you i ellec is o e su e you ve bal a d commu ica io skills ma ch hei s. Whe you cha o social media, ex o alk o he pho e, o si ac oss f om hem a a coffee shop, he sapio**7**ual you wa o woo will admi e you abili y o adhe e o p ope spelli g a d g amma ules i you commu ica io . 

Sapio**7**uals a e u ed o by he hough of hei love bei g well ead a d well spoke —so befo e you se d off you ex ex o hem, iple-check you spelli g a d fac -check you a gume .

Sha e you passio .

The sapio**7**ual you desi e wa s o hea you alk abou opics you’ e k owledgeable i . I ‘s of e he au he ic exp essio of someo e else’s i ellige ce ha is so i igui g a d a ousi g o people who ide ify as sapio**7**ual, Swee poi s ou . If you’ e eally passio a e abou a opic, show you passio while you discuss i .

Whe he i ‘s you obo ics hobby, you favo i e F e ch li e a u e, o you i e es i cosmic explo a io , give hem mo e i sigh i o who you a e, a d speak vigo ously abou wha exci es you. You expe ise will a ouse you sapio**7**ual, especially si ce you ca each hem some hi g ew i he p ocess. 

Swee says she ca a es o his: I emembe bei g so ho fo my 73-yea -old sociology p ofesso whe I was a 20-yea -old u de g ad because he was comple ely passio a e abou wha he was eachi g.

Docume a y a d chill. 

Di e a d a movie is a classic da e- igh op io fo all couples—fo sapio**7**uals, howeve , he la es om-com o book-adap ed h ille may o live up o hei s a da d of i igui g a d exami able ci ema. 

Ra he ha a mai s eam movie, wa ch a docume a y f om you couch o hei s, o buy icke s o he showi g i ow whe a film fes ival olls a ou d. Sapio**7**uals wa o be cap iva ed by he excha ge of abs ac hough , so do ‘ fo ge o hold a discussio af e he docume a y a d compel hem wi h you wo ldly views.

Talk e dy o hem.

Sapio**7**uals a e people who wa o explo e a ac io h ough philosophical ques io s, such as, Wha ‘s he mea i g of life? Do you believe i fa e? o How does o e a ai happi ess? 

I ellec ual co ve sa io , explo a io , a d gai i g pe spec ive a e all quali ies ha co ibu e o a sapio**7**ual’s level of a ac io a d co ec io , He zog ells mbg. Talki g abou wha you do fo a livi g a d whe e you g ew up a e impo a , bu a sapio**7**ual would a he k ow mo e abou you i sigh s a d philosophies. Plus, explo i g ques io s like hese eally allows wo people o ge o k ow each o he o a mo e mea i gful level.

(He e a e a bu ch of deep co ve sa io s a e s fo couples.) 

W i e a sho s o y oge he .

If he sapio**7**ual i you life is a s o y elle , ask if hey wa o pe a sho s o y wi h you. Like he book club, you ca da e o w i e a e o ica s o y ha makes you bo h swea , bu ha ‘s o he o ly way o exci e hem du i g his ac ivi y. Si ce i ellige ce dazzles sapio**7**uals, i ‘ll be a u -o whe you pa ake a d do well a some hi g ha s imula es hem. Feeli gs of desi e owa d you a e su e o s i up as you adequa ely e gage hei i ellec a d c ea e he a hey feel passio a e abou .

Read o hem.

Swee explai s ha people who ide ify as sapio**7**ual value he mi d ove he physical a d ma e ial—i ha case, b i g you o al skills o hei level a d ead wo ks of i e es o you loved o e. Whe he you ead A ais Ni ’s classic e o ica, 17 h-ce u y poe y, o a ech ical ma ual, Mo se says whe you ead hem a book, you’ll s oke he **7**ual a d i ellec ual equi eme s fo ma y sapio**7**uals. 

As you ead, slowly p o ou ce a d delive you wo ds o e ice you pa e o ha g o o each o e. This is he sapio**7**ual equivale of slowly u d essi g wi h you eyes, emphasizes Mo se. To se d hem ove he edge, clea ly a icula e you wo ds. A d acco di g o Swee , you should be mi dful of sy ax, cade ce, o hy hms ha apply o he wo k a ha d. If you succeed, she says, o e se of o al skills may lead o a o he .

P e e d-hos a podcas episode.

Wha is you sapio**7**ual’s favo i e podcas ? The e may be a few, bu lea o e a d lis e o seve al episodes o familia ize you self wi h he subjec ma e . O ce you feel co fide i you abili y o hold you ow i a discussio , pla o spe d he ex da e igh play-hos i g a episode of you ow .

All you eed o do is dow load a f ee app o eco d he show, he decide which episode o pu you spi o , o which opics o cove fo he fi s ime i he same s yle as he podcas show hos s. Remembe his does ‘ have o be pe fec ; wha ma e s is hey’ll be ouched you we ou of you way o i dulge hei pas ime. 

Ge co ove sial.

The mos impo a hi g abou he ac ivi y o explo e aboo subjec s oge he is o do so espec fully. I ‘s easy o ge iled up i espo se o views ha oppose you s, bu o ma e whe he i ‘s eligio o poli ics, a sapio**7**ual will wa o explo e he dep hs of hese opics, o es He zog. She also me io s hese aboo subjec s a e o o ly i c edibly explo a ive bu also impe a ive o be ho es abou . 

Face hese co ove sial co ve sa io s, a d le you love ge o k ow you o a mo e p ofou d level—He zog says you sapio**7**ual will love o dissec you pe spec ive a d he diffe e co cep s ha deeply shape who you a e.

Lea a ew skill oge he .

Imp ess he sapio**7**ual you wa o u o a d commi o a lo g- e m ac ivi y you ca do oge he . Lea a ew la guage o comple e a DIY p ojec —ei he way, hei a ac io will g ow as hey obse ve you buildi g some hi g f om sc a ch o wi ess you ap i ude o lea quickly. Af e oo s i he shed ca easily esul i you wo i bed. 

Howeve you choose o u o a sapio**7**ual, he key is o lead wi h you b ai a d o you body. Like mos people, sapio**7**uals app ecia e good looks, bu i ‘s o wha keeps hem.

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Rese You Gu

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Fa ah Da iel is a f eela ce w i e based i Colo ado. She has a bachelo ‘s deg ee i Digi al Media S udies f om he U ive si y of Sou h Flo ida S . Pe e sbu g. He wo k has bee published a The Pe y Hoa de , The W i e Life, a d elsewhe e. Da iel ma ages a d c ea es co e fo small busi esses, o p ofi s, a d lifes yle publica io s. Wi h five yea s of p ofessio al w i i g u de he bel , he dive se po folio i cludes opics such as well ess, pe so al fi a ce, sales a d ma ke i g, sha ed mic omobili y a d equi y, a d mo e.